Jan. 2005
Feb. 2005
Mar. 2005

Apr. 2005

May 2005

Jun. 2005

Jul. 2005

Aug. 2005

Sep-Nov. 2005

Dec. 2005

Jan. 2006
Feb. 2006

Mar. 2006

Spring '06
July 2006
Nov.-Dec. 2006

The Power to Be the Star You Are!

JANUARY 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005
“By working together, pooling our resources and building on our strengths, we can accomplish great things." Ronald Reagan

Welcome Power Partners to 2005!

Hard to believe that another year has ended, yet we all have the same 24 hours in a day every day regardless of who we are! In this new monthly column I will be addressing many of the issues that are posed to me from so many of you around the globe. Although I do my best to respond to everything, I decided to write a short editorial each month to keep you posted on thoughts, ideas, events, and actions that I feel important to us all.

In December we all witnessed the horrendous devastation of South Asia with the killer tsunami. As we send our resources and prayers to those in need I am reminded of the words of a great author and speaker, Leo Buscaglia: "There are two big forces at work, external and internal. We have very little control over external forces such as tornadoes, earthquakes, floods, disasters, illness and pain. What really matters is the internal force. How do I respond to those disasters? Over that I have complete control." At times like these we feel powerless against the forces of nature and fear fills our souls. As an acting coach, one of the things I always teach is that acting is reacting. Every action results in a reaction. It is the law of cause and effect. Life will always throw us curve balls. How we react to them is a choice. We can see our glass as half full or we can see our glass as half empty. I choose full and so can you. In times of sorrow and

 pain, reach out to others to make a positive difference. Volunteer at a charity, (Be the Star You Are!™ always is in need) help someone with a challenge, perform a random act of kindness. Ironically the person who benefits most will be you.

January is always a time of writing resolutions and goals. Unfortunately within 15 days of writing resolutions, statistics indicate that most people have given up. Let’s do something different this year. Let’s follow through together. Make sure you know the difference between an objective and a goal. An objective can be a statement of what you want to achieve, but a goal has accountability with a timeline. A goal is very specific. (An example is: I will write 200 pages of my book by February 18 and will have it edited and ready for publishing by February 28.) Alan Cohen suggests that instead of noting all the stuff you want to create and achieve in the outer world, focus on who you want to BE and how you want to FEEL within you. I agree with this notion as it fits my motto of BE the STAR you ARE! Remember that life is not about “doing” but about “being”. We are not called “human doings”, we are called “human beings”. Using the example above, how will you feel inside when you have accomplished your goal of writing, editing, and publishing your book? I know for me, I feel humbled and joyful to empower others through the words I write. If I can make a difference in someone else’s life, I have achieved my goals. You can have everything you want if you help enough other people get what they want. Write a marketing plan for your life just as you would for your business.

 Marketing expert, Robert Michael Fried encourages us to create a life of meaning by taking the same amount of time, energy, and focus in planning our personal lives as we do in planning our professional lives. Work towards your strengths, not your weaknesses. The result will be more balance, more purpose, and most of all, more happiness. Make money while making meaning.

My recipe for personal and professional success involves the following steps which I offer you as a gift to implement into your life. Follow these tips and your life will change for the better.

°Dream the Dream (make it larger than life…I call it God Dreams)
°Write the plan (yes that means get it out of your head and onto paper)
°Get the skills you need (that may mean going back to school, hiring a coach, reading more books)
°Go into action (no one is going to knock on your door)
°Find a cheerleader (we all need at least one support person)
°Believe in yourself and all the possibilities (you are unique, you have a gift)

Take a look in the mirror and admire yourself. You are a wonder of creation. Turn your passions into profits and be the star of your own performance. Until next month, celebrate the moment as that is all we ever have.

Blessings to you,
Cynthia Brian
Your personal growth coach


Jury Duty

FEBRUARY 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005
“Not again!” I sighed when I saw the pink notice informing me that I was called for jury duty the week of Thanksgiving. Since I’d be out of town, I postponed until February 1, all the while hoping that somehow they’d forget about me. No such luck! So here I am writing from the great halls of our legal system surrounded by two hundred other worthy citizens wearing “juror” badges, all waiting to be called.

The day didn’t start on a positive note. I can’t afford to be here. Honestly I don’t want to be here. My mind is cluttered with the eighteen items on my “to do” list, all of which have very definite dead lines. “Dead” is the key word here. It doesn’t make me feel empowered. I give myself “timelines” but these are most definitely “deadlines” There was no parking near the courthouse, so I parked in a red zone. A friendly lawyer told me he parks there all the time without receiving a ticket. I put my jury sticker on the windshield anyway. Somehow, my trust in attorneys is not that elevated.

I look around me at the numerous other jurors who are sitting, doing absolutely nothing, just staring into space. Waiting. No book, no magazine, no computer, no cell phone. Waiting. Who are these people? Jury duty must be the highlight of their year. I find a chair at the back of the room in a corner, pull out Michael Gerber’s new tome, E-myth Mastery, and begin to read. I must finish this book today so I can properly interview the world’s #1 small business guru on my radio show tomorrow. A smiling clerk announces that we are adjourned for an hour lunch break. I’m not hungry, but a walk might adjust my attitude. Goodness knows my champagne disposition has lost its bubbles.

Wow! It’s a glorious day outside. The sun is shining, birds are singing. I drag my bags back to my car parked in the red zone so I don’t have to lug everything downtown. No ticket yet. I have a bit more faith in the lawyer at this moment.

People on the sidewalks are cheerful. In fact, everywhere I walk, strangers say ”hello,” “welcome to our town,” “have a great day”. I’m beginning to feel better already. It dawns on me that I’ve been to this city, which is less than an hour from my home, only about three times in my life. Once when I won Outstanding Teenager of California the local newspaper interviewed me. The editor had met me on a camping trip so the story had a folksy personalized angle. 

The second time I came with a design client hunting for antiques or slightly used treasures, and the third time was for a 4-H goat demonstration in which my daughter was involved. This is an adorable little town. It’s like Main Street, USA, straight out of the movies. Barbershops with the striped poles, the carved Indian sitting outside a curios store, mothers with babies in strollers and little toddlers waving to the “chu chu trains” passing. The smell of the sea draws me closer to the bay as I walk through a nature preserve. John Muir used to live here. This is a charming area. My mind is clearing, I am most definitely feeling better.

A quick glance at my watch tells me it’s time to return to the chambers. My step is bit bouncier now. In fact, I am thinking of friends I haven’t seen in a long time, stories I want to write, people I must contact. There is still no ticket on my car as I retrieve my bag. My seat in the back corner of the room beckons. This is wonderful-my own personal office. Feeling energized, my laptop powered, items on my agenda are completed and crossed off that pesky “to do” list. The hours sail by, the case is dismissed, and I’m back at my car. No ticket! That friendly attorney was telling the truth. My admiration soars for the legal profession.

I’m feeling very alive. My timelines are being met. Back in my office I read my emails. Unbelievably the very person I was thinking about while strolling has found me via Google. Jurgen in Sweden, a favorite babysitter when my children were little, re-connected with us today. What serendipity!

The night before, while I complained about jury duty, friend, Libby Gill (author of Traveling Hopefully) had encouraged me to “hang in there” instead of crying “hang ‘em high!” Sound advice for an attitude re-arrangement. What we think about and talk about comes about. What we predict we create.

I’m turning off my computer now so I can stare into space and do nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I mastered a simple assignment today as a result of the pink slip. I feel a camaraderie with the universe. Cynthia is back.

I am a human BEING, not a human DOING.

Some February Features:

*See Heather Brittany as the star of “The Amber Glass” at the Otto Wilhelm Schmidt Theater, 389 North Magnolia Ave. El Cajon, Ca 92020. Call (619) 449-5096 for tickets, or meet me at the World Talk Radio Benefit on February 12th at 2pm. Tickets just $25.00

*February 13 at 11:30am come visit the Earth Song Bookstore where I’ll be speaking and doing a presentation. 1440 Camino Del Mar, Del Mar, Ca. 92014

Good Reads:

*Read Jill Murphy Long’s books, Permission to Nap, Permission to Party, and Permission to Play

*Check out Libby Gill’s book, Traveling Hopefully

*My co-author on Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul, and co0creator of the series, Jack Canfield has a new great book, The Success Principles. Wonderful!

*Richard Pelzer tells a harrowing personal account in “A Brother’s Journey”.

*Ivan Burnell’s “Say Yes to Life” is a quick, powerful tool to improvement.

*Choose books from any of the authors I interview on our radio show. They are all winners. Tune into our radio show every day, somewhere, sometime. Visit http://www.star-style.com/radio/index.htm for schedules and list of guests/books.

And please consider making a donation to our charity, Be the Star You Are! Go to www.bethestaryouare.org

Paypal and Acteva make it easy!

Blessings to you,
Cynthia Brian
Your personal growth coach


The Gift of Happiness

MARCH 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005

It had been a really horrible winter. Rainy, cold, gray, and depressing. We were outdoor kids and had spent too many days indoors. We were very unhappy, and we were sure it was all our parents’ fault.

So the first rainless day in March, Debbie, Patty, and I decided to run away from home. We told Mom and Dad about our plans to go find sunshine and happiness. With a chuckle, they asked if we needed help packing. “No” we responded, “we’re old enough to pack our wagon ourselves.” We were three, four, and five years old respectively, living on a big ranch far from the madding crowd. We had no idea where we were going, but we just knew we had go away to be happy. Our grandparents had bought us a big red wagon with removable wooden sides for Christmas, and we were eager to try it out.

The packing began. We included all of life’s essentials: our dolls, toy cash register, dinosaurs, pogo sticks, jump ropes, play phone, puzzles, picture books, miniature tool set, stuffed animals, hula hoops, Monopoly money, rock collections, roller skates, a plastic shovel, and our battered shared tricycle, which was tied to the back of the wagon. It took hours to get ready. We had many important decisions to make and couldn’t agree on the necessities for our trip. Items like food, water, clothing, and blankets never crossed our minds.

Finally, we were ready. Excitedly, we kissed our parents good-bye and told them we were off to wonderland. They acted as if running away was a common occurrence and wished us a safe and happy journey. Mom handed us a sack of sandwiches she had packed, and Dad suggested we take along our dog Bullet (named after Roy Rogers and Dale Evans’s dog) to protect us and play with us. (Of course, they kept a distant eye on us the whole time.) With our cowboy hats on our heads, our holsters on our hips, and our stick horses as our mode of travel, we started off, singing “Happy Trails to You” as we pulled our heavy load. The tricycle caboose wouldn’t cooperate, so Patty decided to sit on it and steer while Debbie pushed the wagon and I pulled. The dirt road was bumpy and the potholes were deep and full of muddy water from the rains, but we plugged along, cheerfully.

Then suddenly we saw heaven ahead. Mustard—tall yellow spires blanketing the fields—beckoned us to come play. Breaking into a run, we dashed toward this beacon of springtime. The mustard plants were taller than any of us. We could stand and not be seen by each other a few feet away. “This is it!” we exclaimed.

“Let’s set up house!” As we unpacked our valuables, we stomped around in the mustard making rooms for each of us and putting everything in a special place. “This is the kitchen, this is the porch, this is the living room, this is the bedroom, this is the garage.” We lay down in the mustard and rolled around, inhaling the pungent fragrance of this intoxicating plant.

How lucky we were to find such a paradise! Our dolls and stuffed animals loved it too. Bullet found squirrels to chase and barked with enthusiasm. The sounds of rushing water filled the air and we wandered over to the creek. There we found miners’ lettuce, dandelions, wild strawberries, and watercress growing. Pretending we were pioneers, we made a salad using our dolls’ utensils and settled in for our first meal together. We thought it was absolutely delicious! Our shoes came off, and we waded into the water but it was too cold to think of swimming or catching polliwogs. We quickly decided that throwing rocks would be more fun. Lots of wildflowers—shooting stars, lupines, and poppies—adorned the banks, and we picked big bouquets for our new home in the mustard fields.

The rest of the day was spent playing hide-and-seek in the mustard, arranging and rearranging our treasures, and hunting for new rocks. Time sped by, and before long it was dark. The moon came up, and the night sounds sent shivers down our backs. None of us dared show fear. After all, we were happy. The coyotes howled, the owls hooted, and Bullet barked at night-foraging rabbits. At first we had retreated to our separate mustard bedrooms, but soon the three of us curled up together and counted the stars while Bullet was posted as sentry.

We decided that this was the happiest day of our lives, but we wondered if Mom and
Dad missed us.

None of us were awake when Dad came to get his girls. We woke up in our own beds in the morning, the smell of Mom’s cooking wafting from the kitchen. At breakfast we all agreed we had indeed found the Promised Land far, far away, and we shared stories of our thrilling adventure with our parents who listened with rapt attention. We didn’t realize that our enchanted faraway world was only a mile down the road, on our own property. We had never left the ranch.

There truly is no place like home.

That day I learned that happiness is an inside job. Happiness occurs within our hearts. It is not external. No one can make us happy, but cruelty and insensitivity can make us very unhappy. We can all help each other avoid unhappiness by eliminating hateful words, cruel deeds, and abusive looks.

However, anyone who assumes that other people and things can “make” them happy will forever be disappointed. We are responsible for our own happiness or sadness.

One key to happiness is having dreams. Sometimes we need to do something different to reawaken the happiness that already dwells in our souls. My sisters and I dreamed of finding a land of sunshine. By setting out on our journey, we were making a dream come true, though there was no more sunshine down the road than where we had started. Our parents, in their wisdom, allowed us to go. They knew no one could give us happiness. We had to find it within ourselves.

Why do so many people think that happiness is outside themselves? The average child encounters 431 negative messages every day: “Don’t do that!” ”You’re too young for that!” ”I’ve told you a thousand times not to do that!” ”Give me that; you’ll hurt yourself!” It’s hard to find inner exuberance when you’re bombarded by negativity. Our mom and dad helped us find our own happiness by encouraging our search.

Though you can’t make anyone else happy, you can help them find happiness within themselves. Give your friends and loved ones permission to make their own mistakes. Smile to a stranger and affirm that happiness exists. I love George Eliot’s saying, “Wear a smile and have friends, or wear a scowl and have wrinkles.” Smiling is infectious, so pass the smile bug around.

Happiness and sadness are intertwined. Too much sun can create a desert. Too much rain brings floods. A balance is essential for growth. Abraham Lincoln said, “Most people are as happy as they make up their mind to be.”

What makes you happy? A sunset, beautiful music, the smell of flowers or dinner cooking, a baby’s laugh—all can lift our hearts and remind us how wonderful life can be. So can the memory of these things. You control the images you choose to focus on. No one else does. Abundance and joy come from within, not from other people.

Exercise: Catching the Happiness Bug

Happiness is infectious. Once you’ve eliminated the things that make you feel unhappy, you’ll discover how easily you can be happy.

1. How much do you enjoy the following caring activities each day?

Relaxation ____
Meditation ____
Exercise ____
Nutrition ____
Fun! ____

Use the following grading scale:

A = Awesome
B = Beautiful
C = Coming along
D = Dragging

2. Write down a list of the stressors in your life. For example, “I feel burned out at work; my spouse doesn’t understand me; I don’t have enough time for myself; I’m constantly interrupted; I have no appetite (or excessive appetite); I am frequently angry; impatient with the kids.”

3. Now that you recognize your stressors, what can you do to improve your score in the five caring daily activities? What would give you more pleasure and happiness while releasing stress? If you keep tabs on what gets you down, you’ll be able to concentrate on what brings you up. You can catch the happiness bug!

Before I get out of bed in the morning, I take about three minutes to talk to God. I give thanks for everything I have in life, especially my health, and ask for help to live my life to my greatest potential and to serve others. During the day, although I am always stretched for time, I make an effort to grab a couple of pieces of fruit and to drink plenty of water.

When stress begins to build, I take a few deep breaths. If possible, I get outside in the fresh air and listen to nature for a few minutes. Most of all, I smile. This helps others smile, which reflects back to me and makes me smile more. It is amazing how doing just a few small things for yourself every day can “grow” happiness. Try it. As my friend and mentor, Father Patrick McGrath taught me:

Help each other to be happy.

Never mind if help be small.

Giving a little is far better

Than giving none at all.

* * *

No matter how wonderful or wretched things are,

you decide if you’re happy.

Happiness is an inside job.

Excerpted from her book, Be the Star You Are! 99 Gifts for Living, Loving, Laughing, and Learning to Make a Difference (Ten Speed)

©2001 All Rights Reserved

Blessings to you,
Cynthia Brian
Your personal growth coach

Bio:

Cynthia Brian, NY Times best selling co-author of Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul , author of Be the Star You Are!®, 99 Gifts for Living, Loving, Laughing, and Learning to Make a Difference , The Business of Show Business, and Miracle Moments® is a internationally acclaimed key note speaker, personal growth consultant, host of radio and TV shows, syndicated columnist and acting coach. Often referred to by the media as "the Renaissance woman with soul!" Cynthia is a world traveler who speaks French, Spanish, Italian, and Dutch. With over two decades of experience working in the entertainment field as an actor, producer, writer, coach, designer, and casting director, she has had the honor of performing with some of the biggest names in the industry. She is the Founder/CEO of the 501 (c)(3) charity, Be the Star You Are! empowering families and youth at risk through literacy and positive media. Her motto is "To be a leader, you must be a reader!" Cynthia is dedicated to helping others achieve their dreams by implementing their unique gifts and has coached many aspiring thespians, writers, and professionals to fame and fortune. Cynthia’s enthusiasm, energy, and passion will elevate your audience to be the stars of their own lives!

Tune into the radio program live and archived every Wednesday from 6-7pm PST http://www.star-style.com/radio/index.htm

Ode to Life

APRIL 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005

"Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns. I am thankful that thorns have roses." -- Allophones Karr

My Golden pheasant died in my arms today. I had raised him since he was a hatchling when a veterinarian friend moved to Wyoming and needed a home for the baby bird. He grew into a gorgeous specimen with a kaleidoscope of colored feathers so was aptly named Renaissance. He reminded me of a Great Masters painting. Since he was a wild bird, I had held him only thrice in fifteen years-at birth, at death, and once when he was lost and then found. We were family. He knew me as his “mom”. He sang to me as I worked in the garden and I answered his whistles. We comforted one another. He had a long happy life, yet I mourn for his soulful call. This morning he was listless in his aviary. My daughter, Heather, looked at him and whispered to me, “Mom, it’s his time to go home. Prepare yourself.” As I gently cradled my treasured feathered friend, I called my human friend, Jenny, who has dedicated her life to preserving the dignity of the wild kingdom. “Just be with him and make him comfortable, Cynthia. Honor and be grateful for his life.” Renaissance spent his final hours nestled near my heart, then with a final flutter, he waved goodbye.

It’s been a difficult week. On Saturday I gave a eulogy for one of my favorite young acting students who was tragically killed in an automobile accident by a reckless driver who never stopped to witness the carnage. Bret Harte was just 25, an only child with a brilliant mind, devoted friends, a loving family, and a promising career. He was one of those kids you just want to adopt-he was joyous, a prankster, smart, and

diligent. I began coaching him for acting when he was just a kid. He was now producing, directing, and acting with an entourage of adoring fans. As I hugged his amazing parents, I wondered how they will survive such a loss. I reflected on the death of my own sixteen year old brother, David, who was killed when a tractor overturned on top of him on our ranch. Life went on for others, while we have never been the same. My parents hearts were torn apart. Why do the good die young? Why does God take these special angels first? How can the world keep turning while we are ravaged with grief , desperately attempting to make sense of life? I began a memorial fund for Bret at Be the Star You Are!™ Charity. (http:// www.bethestaryouare.org
/BretHarte.html
) so he will be remembered in the Galaxy of Stars. He was a rising star, now he’s a shooting star. The night sky will never again be the same. Have I done enough to celebrate his life, I ask myself?

Burying a bird does not compare with the death of a child, yet if love could have saved them, they would have never died. Allison Dubois, author of “Don’t Kiss Them Goodbye” was on my radio show tonight. She is the woman who is the inspiration for the hit NBC television series, “Medium”. Her words are comforting. She says that we don’t “die” we just “pass over” and although our bodies can’t be hugged, the spirits and souls of our loved ones are with us always. Even our pets are on the other side. I always detested the words “passed over” but I’m beginning to understand the thin veil between “here” and “there”.

It’s spring time. It is supposed to be a time of re-birth, regeneration, renewal, not a time of death. As I peer out at my garden, I see signs of beauty everywhere 

from the deep green grassy hills to the thousands of blooming daffodils, tulips, hyacinths, freesias, and iris I planted in the Fall. Nature is breathtaking.  Is there life after death? I hope so. The spirits of my loved ones, human and animal, live in my memory.

The phone is ringing. I hear the voice on the answering machine asking if I would adopt some baby chicks which hatched for Easter baskets and have since been abandoned. Yes, of course. I am a steward of the planet. I bless our connection to the earth. I will celebrate the gift of knowing Bret, David, Richard, Paul, Nonie, Deane, Fred, Juanita, Daddy, and all those who were snatched from this earthly home before their time. Or maybe it was their time and we all have a date marked on the calendar of the universe with our name on it. My good friend, Deane Hawley, used to say that the acronym for DEATH was DEPART EARTH-AFTER THAT-HEAVEN.

I’m celebrating my heaven right here on earth. Living in the now is the only way to go. Cherish the past, dream of the future, and live every moment of life today. Life is precious. I am grateful for all my relations. Each day anew. Live in harmony and gratitude. We are all one.

“It is in the darkest of nights that we can see the stars.” Emerson

Spring forward, keep your stars shining brightly.

Cynthia Brian
Your personal growth coach
PO Box 422
Moraga, Ca. 94556
925-377-STAR
www.star-style.com

Age is Timeless

MAY 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005

“There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness.”  Marguerite Gardiner Blessington (1789-1849)

“Why don’t you age or something, Cynthia!” my doctor exclaimed as she walked into the examining room where I was sitting dressed in the white paper smock on the occasion of my annual check up. “We can be awesome at any age if we decide to be,” I retorted to this physician who had delivered my daughter twenty years ago. Our lively discussion focused on the choices we make in life-those that empower us as well as those that hinder our growth.

One of those choices is to be happy and to be ageless. Happiness is an inside job and when you choose happiness as a daily mantra, your body seems to glow with the air of youthfulness. As spring and summer approach it feels so appropriate to take a good look in the mirror to admire the beauty that is reflected back.

What are the secrets of longevity? The New England and Okinawa Centenarian Studies are focused on discovering the factors that lead to a long life. Both studies are examining the lives of those over the age of 100, a population estimated in the United States to number 50, 000 and growing. Although we might not all live to be over 100, the findings from both research programs offer insights into the secrets of being healthy as we age:

Positive Attitude-Centenarians overwhelmingly are optimistic, adaptable, and have an easy-going approach to life. They rarely see “age” as a limitation to their ability to enjoy life. In addition, they have a fighting spirit and emotionally stable, flexible, and adaptive.

Relationships-Close relationships and strong social support systems are central to most centenarians. Having emotional and physical support as well as companionship can often be a protective factor with regard to health. Being socially integrated into a large community is also important.

Spirituality-Having a deep spirituality and strong faith is important. Most centenarians have had a lifelong awareness of their spiritual side. For many, it is this factor that has helped them cope with the various challenges life has brought.

Exercise-Maintaining physical strength is essential to living long, and many centenarians participate in strength training in order to maintain muscle strength and bone mass as they age.

Nutrition-They eat moderately and sensibly. Many Okinawan centenarians eat a low calorie, unrefined complex carbohydrate diet, and they practice a cultural habit known as hara hachi bu, only eating until they are 80% full. In addition, eating a diet high in calcium, antioxidants, fruits and vegetables, and minimizing meat, satu5rated and hydrogenated fats, and sweets is critical. Getting enough vitamins is crucial to the fountain of youth.

Managing Stress-Many centenarians have had to cope with major stressful life events throughout their lives, but most weather stress well and have a stress resistant personality. They tend to be self-confident and do not feel rushed and pressed for time.

A Sense of Humor-Laughing at yourself and with others is the best way to meet any situation. We don’t stop laughing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop laughing. A smile gives your face value.

Goldie Hawn is turning 60 in November of 2005. “Goldie Hawn is 60?” you ask with raised eyebrows. “How can that be? She seems so young, so bubbly, so ageless!” Having had the privilege to be her double in the feature film, “Foul Play”, I can tell you that Goldie has patterned her life with the above seven attributes. She loves life. Life loves her back. We can all learn something from her. Live a life of no regrets.

It’s difficult when you look at magazine filled with the perfect visages and bodies of celebrities and models. It makes you feel so imperfect and insignificant. The reality is that most are highly re-touched photos, with a battalion of make-up artists, hair stylists, wardrobe consultants, art directors, and photographers all hired to make sure that perfection is portrayed, not human reality.

So what can we mere mortals do to maintain the springtime of our youth? Being beautiful is not about hair, make-up and clothing. It is truly about loving the person we are on the inside, forgiving our faults, honoring our bodies, and living healthy, happy, and fulfilling lives. My clients ask me for my advice and it is really quite simple and straight forward. We all innately know what to do. We just have to implement the strategies. Besides the seven secrets listed above try a couple of these tips:

*drink lots of water
*slather on the sun screen
*get plenty of sleep
*read empowering books
*pet a pet
*schedule regular medical check-ups
*use less make-up
*pamper yourself
*drink in moderation
*STOP smoking
*play with children
*volunteer with a charity (I suggest Be the Star You Are! www.bethestaryouare.org)
*Brush your teeth and SMILE
*Never give up on your dreams

“I promise to keep living as though I expect to live forever.  Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years.  People grow old only by deserting their ideas.  Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up interest wrinkles the soul.”  -Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964)

Heather Brittany, my daughter, and I are on our way to Lake Austin Spa and Resort as the featured speakers for Mother’s Day week. We’ll be presenting topics on communication, designing a life you love, and ,appropriately, how to be awesome at any age. From the “terrific teens “to the “fabulous forties” to the

“sensational seventies” and beyond, it is time to unveil the amazing person within.

So during this month of May, I challenge you to discover the youthful potential in your relationships, social encounters, love life, career, health, and personal power. It's never too early, or too late to Be The Star You Are! You may not be Goldie, but you are gold. Shine on!

Happy Mother’s Day to one and all.

Starsmiles and blessings,
Cynthia Brian
Your personal growth coach
PO Box 422
Moraga, Ca. 94556
925-377-STAR
www.star-style.com

To obtain rates or to book Cynthia Brian as a speaker for your next engagement, contact Mary Prewitt at Blue Feather Management, toll free 888-797-6700 or email: Mary@bluefeathermanagement.com.

Biographical Sketch

Cynthia Brian, NY Times best selling co-author of Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul , author of Be the Star You Are!®, 99 Gifts for Living, Loving, Laughing, and Learning to Make a Difference, The Business of Show Business, and Miracle Moments®., is an internationally acclaimed key note speaker, personal growth consultant, host of radio and TV shows, syndicated columnist and acting coach. Cynthia Brian is often referred to by the media as “the Renaissance woman with soul!" She is a world traveler who speaks French, Spanish, Italian, and Dutch. With nearly three decades of experience working in the entertainment field as an actor, producer, writer, coach, designer, and casting director, she has had the honor of performing with some of the biggest names in the industry. Cynthia is a Certified Interior Designer and has had her interior and garden design projects featured in TV, commercials, books, and numerous publications. She is the Founder and CEO of the 501(c)(3) charity, Be the Star You Are! empowering families and youth at risk through literacy and positive media. Her motto is “To be a leader, you must be a reader!” Ms. Brian is dedicated to helping others achieve their dreams by implementing their unique gifts and has coached many aspiring thespians, writers, and professionals to fame and fortune.

Tune into Cynthia’s popular radio program, Starstyle®-Be the Star You Are! for more inspiration, advice, and interviews with authors
http://www.star-style.com/
radio/index.htm
.

Buy her books
http://www.star-style.com/
store/index.htm

Donate to the charity: http://www.bethestaryouare.org

The Star Shine of Wine

JUNE 2005 FEATURE STORY
by Cynthia Brian ©2005

On May 25, 2005, the town of Napa in California honored my grandfather, Fred Abruzzini as the “Father of Napa Valley Wine Tourism” by dedicating a park in his honor. As a member of the Parks and Recreation Committee, Bill Know, a long time friend and public relations expert from Beringer Brothers Winery in St.Helena, California, had lobbied for this special accolade for Fred Abruzzini. About 30 members of our family attended the occasion and we are all so delighted as Fred was such an inspiration and positive force in our lives. Interestingly, it coincided with a writing award I won for a story I had written celebrating the life of my grandfather that was sponsored by the Southern California Genealogical Society.

I like to think that some of my promotional show business acumen and dedication to helping others was fostered at the knee of grandpa. To our great sadness, he was killed while mowing his lawn by a falling tree in 1989 at the age of 84. He was in perfect health and was happy, energetic, and passionate to the end of his days. His legacy to California and the Napa Valley Wine industry is continuous and monumental.

Read on to find out more about this quiet, self made gentleman who put Napa Valley on the map—literally! And why not enjoy a glass of fine Napa Valley wine while you are reading. Salute

* * *

Although he stood no more than five foot nine inches tall, my paternal grandfather, Fred Abruzzini, was a gentle giant. He was a self-made man, very soft spoken yet extremely affable and well liked. In fact, he was what we kids called “famous”. As a child, I thrived in his company and could never get enough of his energy, enthusiasm, and passion for life. His stories and his achievements were filled with inspiration from perspiration. When I was in my thirties I decided to tape record our conversations for posterity so that I would get to learn directly from him about his success strategies and life choices. We’d sit in his “trophy room”, a small space covered with framed black and white photographs of him and celebrities, flipping through hundreds of scrapbooks, while I let the tapes roll. Grandpa was humble and modest as he described his ascent in the wine industry and the numerous movie stars who were his friends.

As I write his history today, I am grateful for those tapes and my numerous notes. Grandpa was a strong, healthy and robust man, so who could have known that an elm tree would fall on him on a calm day killing him instantly as he mowed his lawn. His life ended much too soon. In 2005, a park will be dedicated in his honor on Orchard Avenue in the town of Napa. I look forward to sharing his stories while celebrating the life of a great wine showman who put Napa Valley on the map.

Fred Abruzzini was the son of Italian immigrants who emigrated to Canada at the turn of the century. With only an eighth grade education, Grandpa Fred set off for California to work for his uncle, Benjamino Cribari, who had a small winery. Grandpa Fred was determined to succeed, but his timing couldn’t have been worse.

It was 1920, and Prohibition, the “noble experiment,” had just become law. All alcoholic beverages were forbidden, and the wineries were in big trouble. Wineries were only allowed to produce a minute quantity of wine for sacramental and medicinal purposes. Wine grapes, the results of decades of specialized cultivation, were being sold for grape-flavoring syrup, grape juice, and an alcohol-free imitation wine. Then came the 1929 stock market crash that kicked off the Great Depression. Most wineries had already gone bankrupt. The ones still surviving remained open on a tentative basis.

Grandpa Fred built a reputation for honesty and efficiency at the Cribari Winery. When the federal tax agents found suspicious irregularities in wine production reports at the larger and more prestigious Beringer Brothers Winery, they suggested to Bertha 

Beringer that she might hire someone with a solid record for wine inspections. Someone like Fred Abruzzini from the Cribari Winery.

At Bertha’s invitation, Grandpa drove north to St. Helena to look over the situation. When he saw the great vats and underground storage vaults, Grandpa said, “Now this is a place to make wine!” But he wasn’t sure whether he should leave the security of his job with Cribari. He had worked for his uncle for twelve years and was destined to become a shareholder.

Finally, he accepted the challenge. In exchange for free rein and a percentage of the profits, he became general manager, wine master, and chief promoter at Beringer Brothers. Of course, there were no profits in those days. But Grandpa Fred was determined to turn the business around.

He straightened out the wine records and organized the books. Then he used his Cribari connections to buy more grape juice for altar wine sales to provide essential cash flow. Next, he turned to the winery’s long-neglected prune trees, restoring them to vigor and planting more in the vineyard’s fallow land. He used the prunes in a big marketing push. Salesmen presented beautifully packaged prunes when they visited churches to sell altar wines. Beringer wine sales skyrocketed.

By 1932, there was talk that Prohibition might end if Franklin Delano Roosevelt became president. Grandpa Fred gambled on a Democratic win, and began crushing more grapes to make port. His bet paid off. Roosevelt was elected in November 1932, and Prohibition ended in December 1933. Grandpa was ready with a big ad: “At last, after fourteen years of suspended animation, Beringer’s famous cellars…have become a madhouse.”

It took great determination to rebuild an industry that had been shut down for fourteen years. Speakeasies had made alcoholic beverages synonymous with sin. The image of fine dining and glamour had to be restored. Grandpa Fred came up with a determined promotion idea. At that time, few people had heard of Napa Valley, California. None of the wineries that are famous today—Beringer, Beaulieu, Martini, Inglenook, Christian Brothers, and Charles Krug—were doing very well. In May 1934, Grandpa Fred opened the Beringer caves to public tours, creating California’s wine tourist industry. That September, during the first revival of the annual Vintage Festival since 1919, he brought five thousand visitors into his cellars for a tour and a chance to buy Beringer wines.

Still, Grandpa knew he needed even more publicity. He sent beautiful gift packages of Beringer wine, walnuts, and prunes to dignitaries and movie stars, along with a note saying: “Come up to the beautiful Napa Valley, and we’ll treat you like a star.”

Cowboy star Tom Mix brought his traveling show to be part of the entertainment. Heavyweight champion Max Baer and Gone with the Wind’s hero, Clark Gable visited and Grandpa Fred’s close friends. Grandpa lured famous visitors and gave them lots of publicity, making sure their photos were taken in front of an enormous Beringer wine barrel. It wasn’t long before public figures, movie stars, politicians, or sports celebrities visiting San Francisco made it a point to travel north to Beringer Brothers.

Grandpa Fred didn’t stop with celebrities. In 1939, the World’s Fair was held on Treasure Island in San Francisco Bay. He drew up a map of Napa Valley. “All roads lead to Beringer!” it said at the top. Grandpa Fred, my Grandma Juanita, and their three sons (my dad, Alfred, and my uncles Jack and Ron) traveled to 

Treasure Island and handed out maps to fair goers. To make visiting the winery easy, Grandpa Fred provided free buses for anyone who wanted to make the side trip.

To greet all these new guests, Grandpa Fred renovated a building called the Rhine House into a reception hall and tasting room. He surrounded it with picnic tables and built huge, 

outdoor barbecue pits, still standing today.  Visitors could enjoy free barbecue and steak dinners while overlooking the vineyards and hazy purple mountains in the distance. By 1940, over twenty-five thousand people were visiting the Beringer Winery each year. Corporations and social clubs began scheduling their picnics and meetings in St. Helena. Visitors went home and told their friends about the incredible hospitality at Beringer Brothers Winery.

Today, winery tours are a staple of tourism and wine sales in California, and indeed around the country and the world. Grandpa Fred Abruzzini, is sometimes referred to as “The Father of the Napa Valley”, and is revered as an innovator and marketer extraordinaire. When he retired after twenty-four years with Beringer, all the major Napa-Sonoma wineries were conducting tours and wine tastings, basking in being part of one of the most beautiful wine-producing regions of the world. Napa Valley was literally put on the map by a determined young man with an eighth grade education!

Grandpa Fred, despite his spunk, was a simple, soft-spoken man, described as “earthy” and “real.” Everyone adored him, from the humblest farm worker to the most exalted celebrity. He had ability to make others feel good about themselves. His ten grandchildren all share his amazing gift of determination. We are honored to call Fred Abruzzini “Grandpa.”

Starsmiles and blessings,

Cynthia Brian

© 2005
Starstyle® Productions, LLC
PO Box 422
Moraga, Ca. 94556
www.star-style.com

To obtain rates or to book Cynthia Brian as a speaker for your next engagement, contact Mary Prewitt at Blue Feather Management, toll free 888-797-6700 or email: Mary@bluefeathermanagement.com.

Biographical Sketch

Cynthia Brian, NY Times best selling co-author of Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul , author of Be the Star You Are!®, 99 Gifts for Living, Loving, Laughing, and Learning to Make a Difference, The Business of Show Business, and Miracle Moments®., is an internationally acclaimed key note speaker, personal growth consultant, host of radio and TV shows, syndicated columnist and acting coach. Cynthia Brian is often referred to by the media as “the Renaissance woman with soul!" She is a world traveler who speaks French, Spanish, Italian, and Dutch. With nearly three decades of experience working in the entertainment field as an actor, producer, writer, coach, designer, and casting director, she has had the honor of performing with some of the biggest names in the industry. Cynthia is a Certified Interior Designer and has had her interior and garden design projects featured in TV, commercials, books, and numerous publications. She is the Founder and CEO of the 501(c)(3) charity, Be the Star You Are! empowering families and youth at risk through literacy and positive media. Her motto is “To be a leader, you must be a reader!” Ms. Brian is dedicated to helping others achieve their dreams by implementing their unique gifts and has coached many aspiring thespians, writers, and professionals to fame and fortune.

Tune into Cynthia’s popular radio program, Starstyle®-Be the Star You Are! for more inspiration, advice, and interviews with authors. http://www.star-style.com/radio/index.htm.

Buy her books- http://www.star-style.com/store/index.htm

Donate to the charity: http://www.bethestaryouare.org

Do It Right - The First Time!

 JULY 2005 FEATURE STORY
  by Cynthia Brian ©2005

Our house, which is only about 18 years old, is basically falling apart! What we thought was our dream home has turned into a nightmare. A movie was made about our house-it’s called The Money Pit. Can you relate?

We built this house after walking land for ten years, interviewing 6 architects, 18 contractors, and 43 lenders. We wanted only the best because we wanted to do it right and only do it once. We worked hard, saved our money, invested wisely, got educated about the process, then hired great people based on solid information and numerous recommendations.

Almost from day one the problems began. The architect added up the square feet incorrectly which meant the contractor’s bid was over budget. The framer disappeared with the dollars we paid the contractor, resulting in a lien to the house. The windows were delayed for months allowing the rains to drown the building in the winter. The superintendent had the nickname “Waving Rich” as he seemed to be afraid of his sub-contractors. Instead of checking on them, he’d drive to the top of the driveway, wave to everyone and leave. What was supposed to be nine months of construction evolved into 18 months of high stress and diminishing bank accounts. Despite the setbacks and cost escalations, we hung in there with full faith in our builder.

Our lender was a dream, extended our loans, and helped us avoid bankruptcy. We eventually moved in and thought the craziness was over. It was just beginning. Our kids sailed boats in the crawl space under the house which had become a lake while decorative columns rotted, and the deck sagged. We’d call the builder, he’d send out Waving Rich. A few things would be repaired, just to fail a couple of years down the road. We’d be told to caulk and paint the entire house, which we did….THREE TIMES.

My husband lost his patience and became furious. We are both people that believe in integrity and standing behind your work. After spending so much money, why was such a young beautiful house riddled with problems? A paper trail of letters and emails ensued. Yet because we really believed in and liked our builder, and we are not litigious people, we never pursued any legal intervention. Big mistake on our part!

that our house is a “textbook case” of improper construction, inappropriate materials, and poor supervision during the building stage. The gutters are too small for the pitch of the roof and the size of the home, there are no flashing materials in evidence anywhere, the wood used was pine or plywood instead of cedar or redwood, some of the roof tiles are not even nailed down. The experts tell us that no matter how many times we caulked, painted, or maintained, this house was disintegrating before it was even finished. This renowned builder with the stellar reputation performed miserably on this project.

We must liquidate our retirement accounts to bear the burden of these expenses. The new California laws, forged by builders and the insurance companies, absolve the contractor of any responsibility after ten years. In hindsight, we regret being so kind. We regret having faith in the builder. We regret believing in his integrity and honesty to do the right thing. We are paying a very high price for maintaining what we thought was a friendship between us.

Regret begets no relief. The reality is we always have and always will want to believe in the goodness of people. We want to trust in their word. We want to feel that those we hire are honest and will do the job as specified. We don’t want to sue anyone. We want to build relationships that linger.

Karma rules the world. What goes around, comes around. Word of mouth is always the best advertisement or the worst sanction. What’s going to happen? The optimist in me writes the ending with the contractor visiting the site, noticeably appalled by what has happened to his masterpiece. Peter resurrects his compassionate character by correcting the mistakes of the subs. He does the right thing. We compromise on the costs. Everyone shakes hands and the house becomes the home we had hoped to build.

Another ending-like Scarlett in Gone with the Wind, I’ll think about that tomorrow. It probably involves lawyers and the media which means no one shakes hands or wins.

If you’ve encountered a similar experience, I’d love to hear how you handled it. Email me at cynthia@NOSPAMstar-style.com (Eliminate the words NO SPAM from the email address before sending-this is to keep away the web crawlers.)

Until next month, keep a positive outlook on life even when the walls are falling down around you. I am! And, remember when doing anything, DO IT RIGHT, THE FIRST TIME!

Happy summer to all.

Starsmiles and blessings,

Cynthia Brian

© 2005
Starstyle® Productions, LLC
PO Box 422
Moraga, Ca. 94556
www.star-style.com

To obtain rates or to book Cynthia Brian as a speaker for your next engagement, contact Mary Prewitt at Blue Feather Management, toll free 888-797-6700 or email: Mary@bluefeathermanagement.com.

Biographical Sketch

Cynthia Brian, NY Times best selling co-author of Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul , author of Be the Star You Are!®, 99 Gifts for Living, Loving, Laughing, and Learning to Make a Difference, The Business of Show Business, and Miracle Moments®., is an internationally acclaimed key note speaker, personal growth consultant, host of radio and TV shows, syndicated columnist and acting coach. Cynthia Brian is often referred to by the media as “the Renaissance woman with soul!" She is a world traveler who speaks French, Spanish, Italian, and Dutch. With nearly three decades of experience working in the entertainment field as an actor, producer, writer, coach, designer, and casting director, she has had the honor of performing with some of the biggest names in the industry. Cynthia is a Certified Interior Designer and has had her interior and garden design projects featured in TV, commercials, books, and numerous publications. She is the Founder and CEO of the 501(c)(3) charity, Be the Star You Are! empowering families and youth at risk through literacy and positive media. Her motto is “To be a leader, you must be a reader!” Ms. Brian is dedicated to helping others achieve their dreams by implementing their unique gifts and has coached many aspiring thespians, writers, and professionals to fame and fortune.